Somerset Tour '98

The tour to beat all tours was under way on Monday, 15th June. There were eighteen due to stay at Butlins Somerwest World resort in Minehead. Unfortunately, Simon Parsons dropped out at the last minute (perhaps he heard we did terrible things to tour virgins?). In fact, due to strike action on the railways, his leave was cancelled.

An uneventful trip down saw us all join up in Butlins at the " Swinging Shelalagh" bar to watch the opening World Cup match for England against Tunisia.

Would you believe it? Butlins had run out of " Becks" , and we had to drink " Budweisers" or " Hols Pilsten" ! After witnessing a satisfactory 2-0 win for England on the large screens, we dispersed towards the beach. We were unable to book into our chalets until 4pm.

Baz Crouch went off to buy a set of cricket stumps and a bat and ball and then set out a boundary and picked two sides. No idea who won, but it was great fun for all. It also gave Ray Slaughter a chance to hold a bat, because he had travelled all the way down to Somerset leaving his newly acquired bat and gloves back in Sussex!

We booked into our chalets, which were very good except for no showers, only a bath, for 5 to share! Various shopping trips were undertaken to enable us to acquire necessary provisions.

A game of crazy football was started between the chalets - much to the amusement of some small children who thought they best not join in.

Everyone left the site for a local carvery for a substantial meal in the town. Everyone, that is, but two. Brian Still, was not hungry, but had agreed to take Joe on a trip to Lynmouth for some photography exercise, but he had lost his car keys!!! After turning the chalet upside down, unmaking beds and returning to look around the car, it was thought best to report the loss to security.

A much amused gateman had found the keys sticking out of his car boot lock and brought them back to headquarters. What a plonker!

We still had time to take photographs at Lynmouth, just as well we arrived when we did, because we witnessed a beautiful sunset!

Tuesday greeted us with excellent weather. Stories about the night before kept rolling in. Gez apparently bought some chips on his way home from " Barnums" (Butlins entertainment club) and ended up asleep whilst eating them! He was found in the morning with chips everywhere and a chip bag over his face!

By mid-morning, Fletch had treated his chalet mates with a full English breakfast - very nice indeed!

It was not long before we set off to Timberscombe for our first Tour fixture. We always have a good game here and this was no exception. A 40 over match was agreed upon and Ansty batted first with Richard Nichols skippering for the day.

Baz Watling scored whilst Joe took photographs and after 4 overs, we were 16-1 with Hadders back in the pavilion having just been bowled. Brian Still was number three and lasted just three balls before he, too, was bowled and Ansty were 18-2 after 5 overs. Rich Nichols joined opener Kevin Davey and together they tore apart the Timberscombe attack as they put on 247 for the third wicket. Rich was eventually caught on 120 in the 37th over with Ansty on 265-3. Roger Hawke joined Kevin and a further 31 runs were added before tea. Kev carried his bat with an unbeaten 146.

Many tour records were broken, i.e. record partnerships, highest individual score, etc., etc. Kevin hit 9 sixes, a five and 13 fours in his innings and Richard hit 7 sixes and 11 fours in his knock

Amusing incidents remembered during the game included Andy Hadfield climbing over a gate instead of walking through it, and mistaking a member of the opposition as our own Rich Nichols wearing slippers! We were unable to start promptly because Stilly had left the Match ball in his car! We also watched the " grim reaper" walk pass us many a time as he set about cutting grass to enable us to find lost balls.

It has not been Brian Still's tour so far - lost keys, forgot ball, out for a duck, and no food ordered for the meal in the pub after the match. At least he took 2 wickets. Was the tour going to get any better for him? Keep reading....

Our tour judge was the Hon. Wiggy Judge Motty and he reminded us of all our misfields, dropped catches and other misdemeanors. The " Arnold" award was for the someone doing or being involved in something silly. " Stilly" was favourite for this award , but the vote went for " Hadders" , pictured below with the Hon. Wiggy Judge Motty.

We returned to Butlins' to change and prepare for another evening being entertained by the acts on stage at " Barnums" . Many memories here once more, not necessary to publish here, but one highlight was Rich Nichols complaining to a supervisor after losing his drink!

An evening at " Barnums" would not be complete without a pint (or two) and a friendly Panda.

Tom Benham is seen with his latest friend

Tom Benham and his Panda friend

Wednesday greeted us with dark clouds and the threat of rain, which did occur as the morning went on. " Hadders was in touch with with East Huntspill to check if the game was on. Stories were being told of Barry Crouch sleeping in his chalet with a beer in his hand, and was Rich Nichols sleeping on a stool during the night at Barnums?

Mr Kidner of East Huntspill said that they had very little rain and that the game was on. He added, " Do you want my number so that you can ring me?" Hadders replied " I've got your number, because I've just rung you!"

Hadders went shopping after that saying, " I'm bound to bring back something I've forgotten!" Tour does funny things to peoples' conversations!

Hadders was also embarrassed to wear the " Arnold" tank top around Butlin's! He even hid behind a tree so that people wouldn't notice!

We met outside our chalets for the long haul to East Huntspill - it takes about 45 minutes to an hour to get there. Neil Machin had woken up just 15 minutes before. Kevin Davey was missing the game as he had promised to take Wendy to the Tropicana to see all the tropical spiders and other creepy-crawlies. We thought how nasty of Kevin to frighten Wendy so, but it turns out that Kevin is the frightened one as far as creepy crawlies are concerned!

Ansty skipper of the day Roger Hawke put East Huntspill in as they played another 40 over match. Neil Machin bowled their opener on the first delivery of the innings. From then on things went downhill fast. Rich Nichols was also resting this day, but came along to watch as the home side scored 193-8. Matt Richardson and Neil Machin took three wickets apiece and Brian Still dropped three catches, with other rumoured " safe hands" , i.e. Barry Crouch and Ray Slaughter, spilling two catches. Ray did hurt his finger trying to hold onto a return catch!

After tea, we lost a wicket in the second over, Baz Crouch caught behind for 1. The score had progressed to 15 before his opening partner Andy Hadfield had been bowled. Five balls later and Brian Still was walking back to the pavilion with another duck to his name. What a game he's been having!

The nerves were beginning to show. Matt Richardson, having just had tea, was tucking into a large box of Frosties and Ray Slaughter was resting his damaged finger, thumbing through the pages of a women's magazine!

Gez scored 15 and Roger Hawke steadied the sinking ship as rain came down with useful late partnerships with Neil Machin (20), Matt Richardson (13) and Ray " No-bat" Slaughter (23no) to see Ansty reach 136 all out. Rog himself made 23, whilst others failed. Wicketkeeper Tom lasted just two balls for his duck, but we know the reasons for that don't we Tom? Richard Nichols, umpiring for Joe in the second innings, even had a brolly with him when the drizzle arrived!

The highlight for me at this match was the reverse sweep by Ray Slaughter that only went as far as the keeper! Roger backing up, heard Ray say " Yes!" only for Roger to reply " No!" before a misfield enabled them to scramble a run! A champagne moment!

In the pub afterwards, Judge Wiggy Motty had read out the fines list, Brian Still suffered hugely here and once more looked odds on to win the " Arnold" tank-top. The vote went to Richard Nichols, who was well and truly " stitched-up" !

Whilst we were getting ready to eat our meals, the " Dinner Lady" fancied Rich Nichols in his tank-top! A phone call arrived for Tom supposedly from a young lady in Butlins! What a wind-up! For some reason, Tom was banished from the long table and had to eat on his own. I hope he ordered the right meal this time!

We left the pub for the long journey back to Minehead and be entertained by at the various bars around Butlins that evening. A very good Scottish comedian was in one bar. Not to everyone's taste, however!

Thursday morning, and it was raining. Matt and Neil were awake earlier to enable them to watch Teletubbies on TV. Brian Still and I left early to search around the area at some new cricket grounds to replace the Wednesday fixture. We saw some very good settings and two of them seemed to have excellent facilities. One we visited, at Bridgetown, not West Indies I Hasten to add!, was very picturesque with a tiny thatched pavilion. You had to clamber over a wooden bridge to get on the ground, which crossed a fast flowing river.

On our visits, the rain had not ceased, so we naturally thought the match at Brompton Ralph was a non-starter!

We were pleasantly surprised that as we pulled up at the ground, everyone else was there and the game was going ahead! Barry Crouch was our skipper for this match, another 40-over affair and yours truly took over the scorebox, but was assisted in the scorebox by Baz Watling.

Ansty batted first and made 260-7 with Kevin Davey hitting 76. He and Gez Brown (33) put on 91 for the first wicket, a tour best, and other good knocks came from Rich Nichols, who retired hurt with a back injury before he had to buy a jug having scored 43. Matt Richardson went in at 5 and scored 21. A big cheer went up for Mr Sitwell, who scored his first runs on tour this year - six!

A good game in prospect, with injured Rich hiding in the field before coming off. We continued with ten fielders as we bowled out Brompton Ralph for 207. At one stage, they looked capable of getting the target, but three wickets apiece from ray Slaughter (for just 8 runs) and Barry Crouch and two taken by Neil Machin clinched victory. One highlight was an amazing caught and bowled by the " Nice Bloke" , considering the two dropped catches the day before!

After the fines, the " Arnold" tank-top was presented to their number nine batsman, D Hill, who let go of his bat playing a drive through the covers. His bat went close to the boundary, but the ball stayed at the crease!

The evening at Brompton Ralph finished with our hosts preparing a lovely barbecue before we left to return for our final night at Butlins' before our journey homewards the next day. At " Barnums" that night the tour party were privileged to witness the birth of a new dance routine, " The Stilly Shuffle" ! Everywhere you looked around the bars you could see the " Stilly Shuffle" !